Welcome to the Biscuit Bureau

Field Notes

“Classic doesn’t really cover it for this biscuit. Legend says the neolithic people of britain carved the slabs of Stonehenge to resemble their primitive bourbon biccies. So old is the bourbon that no one can remember what its flavour is meant to be - least of all the monks who still bake these for the supermarkets of today. As best I can describe, it’s the flavour of a memory you’ve forgotten but can feel was just there in your head. These five tasted like the only time i was ever in my grandmother’s house alone. I felt like Marcel Proust with a touch of dementia. With no flavour or texture interest to distract you these basically eat themselves (especially when paired with a few Youtube Shorts). Dunking is a must, to introduce some textural variety. Would I choose to have these again? I wouldn’t recommend them to a new visitor to the UK. Thankfully I don’t need to choose - a deep ancestral reflex brings me back to them time and again”